A question for coaches and parents

not an easy choice at all. as parents we have to stand by the decisions made by our adult kids, well because they are adults. we can only share our experiences both good and bad and try to give them useful advice. whether or not they listen is again their decision. the most important thing for them to do is simply write down pros & cons for the choices they are facing. if they are willing to live with that choice (for a lifetime) then you have your answer. life is full of ups and downs no matter what you do but i would much rather be working hard to play a game (must be passionate for the game) than wiring these electrical panels all day. carpel tunnel is a killer

 

Welcome aboard Stretchlon. I bet SoutherNo1 is glad you have found us. His voice was getting hoarse from carrying the banner

 

Just curious, but how would it change parents/coaches feelings if the kid were still in H.S. ????

 

easy answer...

but it hurts! Best of luck son daughter whatever you'll be happy with in your future I ll support you one hundred percent!

 

glad you asked

Hatfield, glad you referred this post to a HS level (hope it's OK with Braves!).

I am going through this issue now in HS, although not in baseball. It is softball and my 10th grade daughter (dd as they like to call it on the softball bd., stands for darling daughter!), but I think the same passions would apply.

Anyway, my dd has informed me that she will not be playing softball anymore. She has always played and played it very well. Part-time varsity starter last year as a soph; won the coach's award as a freshman on JV, a certain projected starter for her jr year, the coach is still trying to get her to change her mind, etc.
Her class is an unusually strong class of girl athletes and they dominate the sports teams in #'s and talent at the HS. About me, I have always been real active in youth sports.....coaching, fd maint, organize leagues, work at conc stand, whatever, you name it.

When she told me she was giving up softball, it really floored me. I was angry and disappointed and I told her so. Honestly I did not sleep well for a few days. I talked to my brother about it knowing he had gone through an almost identical situation w/ his son in HS baseball a few yr's ago. I'll always remember what he told me: You will go through 3 emotions in this order: anger, disappointment, & finally RELIEF. Relief when it's all over & forgotten and you and your son/ daughter can just get on with your lives.

She will now only play HS tennis (she says it is much less stress).
It really knawed at me, but I am starting to see the relief. I have attained a new feeling that if she wants her independence, by gosh she can have it...........I will get out of the way and let her go for it!!

And I am planning things to do with my time that was previously taken up with her softball games, etc.

This is a great and REAL issue with kids and their parents.

 

scholly gone?

anyone, on the college level when this happens , does that means the scholarship aid is ka-poof / gone??

another question: someone mentioned that a college kid could maybe take a few days/ weeks off from the game and think about it. how do they do that when the practice schedule and expected individual workouts are so demanding.........wouldn't the coaches notice the changes?

 

He found the door Braves, but he couldn't get it open for a while. Glad you found the key Stretch.

 

Son gives up baseball

I had this happen to me. My son early on decided he would not want to play baseball in College. One of his reasons was that if he was playing in the future fulltime then it could affect having a normal family life. Another reason he gave was that it would be to difficult to play and study in College. The last reason was that he had been told by friends that baseball in College was all work and no fun. Sounded to me like all good reasons but of course I still wanted him to play in College even if he had to play at an all girls school, on the other hand he had his eyes on UNCW. After getting over my initial blues I am glad that I did not interfere with his decision (like I had done from age 9-17). At least now I see that he is trying to reach the goals he has set for himself and hopefully he will be better off in the long run than the short run joy I would have had seeing him play for a few more years. Another eye opener for me was now that I am coaching teams without my son and seeing other dads push their sons into playing and other coaches not making it fun I can see more clearly why so many kids don't really enjoy the game like they should. Thanks.

 

WOW

"You will go through 3 emotions in this order: anger, disappointment, & finally RELIEF. Relief when it's all over & forgotten and you and your son/ daughter can just get on with your lives."

^one of the most interesting and profound statements I have read on this board......ever. Makes you almost wonder if father/son relationship would be better without baseball than with.

 

passion

I think the bottom line on this issue is "passion".
If it's there , if that's where the kid's heart really is.........then nothing will keep them away from the sport (not even hard work on the fd & in classroom, future family considerations, etc). And if the passion is there, then the sport including hard work will be "fun".

It's hard when the parent has the passion for their kid in sports, but the kid is losing his/her passion. But I think it's just a natural occurrence and that's just life............. hey the end of a playing career will come for all , it's just at different times.