Attributes In A Coach ???

I had to change the original message because two of my friends asked if I was talking about them. I was not!

 

Wow!!!!.....all I can say is WOW!!!!!!!

I can honestly say that I have never met or have seen this type of coach....Thank god

 

This is a great topic. I agree that one of the most important things is not to badmouth a former player. I do have a question about what is talking bad about a player and what is an honest assement of that players skill level. I know that saying something like a girl should take up knitting instead of softball is bad mouthing her (it also makes the coach look bad because you picked her up to begin with) But is giving your honest assement of a player, Ie: she has a good glove and speed but a weak bat and limited range in the field bad mouthing?
I know when asked by a college recruiter for your opinion of any player you need to be honest because if you say so and so is the best player since Dot Richardson and the girl is barely avg. your credentials as a coach become much less valued in the recruiting area which in the long run affects all your girls.
And then there is always the question of parents bad mouthing the former team and coach. I see that as a two way street, respect on both sides. But that could be another thread .

 

What's The Motive ???

I would have to view the motive of the assessor. I would have to review the information to see if it is factual or is the coach trying to get back at the kid for some apparent reason. Many people are in prison because of incorrect accusations and fly by night jurors, that really don't care deep down about the accussed well-being. So yes it has to be 50/50 review before I would listen to just one person...GURU

 

I understand your point....

Instead of saying "she has a good glove and speed but a weak bat and limited range in the field" Maybe you could say " she has a good glove and speed but she will need to work on her bat and fielding range" then maybe add something positive about the player as well like maybe she has try and effort that won't stop or she knows how to be a team player!
I agree that you have to give your opinion, of the player's accurate skill level! I am by no means saying to lie! I am just saying if you feel that you should criticize parts of the players game, then say something positive about her game as well!
Maybe if you feel that you can't say anything positive about the player, then you should direct the coach to someone else for their assesment of that player.
Just always try and think to yourself, what if this was my DD?
No I wouldn't compare any other player to Dot Richardson or Lisa Fernandez or Crystal Bustos or Jinny Finch, or etc..... Everyone has to be theirself! By comparing someone to someone who has accomplished so much, can lead to that player trying to feel someone else's shoes, that leads to trouble! Each player should be encouraged to do their best! Like guru said in his post, encourage the coach to assess each player for theirself!
I think you mean well! I do not think that you mean to be "bad mouthing" a player. JMO

 

Coach

Dawgfan does have a good point, if asked, U must be honest and give strengths and weaknesses, even GPA, SAT, etc. I do try to stick to strengths and as U say down play weaknesses unless they are glaring. U can always put a positive twist on any comment and we all should do our best to take that route.

I have seen coaches over the years that are all positive about a kid till she decided to leave and then suddenly she is terrible, can't understand how he ever let her play for him. This is the worst thing U can ever do!

Loyalty is in play as long as U provide what a parent or kid wants and sometimes even when U do that, they leave. The last few years have taught me a lot of valuable lessons about parents, players, and other coaches. I hate I have learned some of it but hope it will make me a better coach, person, and child of God over time. I am not perfect and admit that readily but will certainly try to take something good from something that appears bad.

All have a great fall and keep helping these wonderful young ladies that play fastpitch softball.

 

That's the best route to take and it also depends on who is asking the question?

Where I deplore any suggestion about attacking one's character, to give an honest appraisal of a player's ability to a college recruiter is necessary.

But, in reality, they will form their own opinion and make their own conclusions.

I don't like double talk (Where a coach may say different things to different people), but those coaches are discovered quickly and their opinions will be ignored.

If I was a parent or player, I wouldn't get too caught up in that stuff. That reputation gets known quickly and the coach's credibility will be damaged.

Of all the things that I have read in TBR over the years this is one of the most important. Families need to do their "homework". If you find yourself in this situation....shame on you for not asking questions first before you jumped.

 

Abbey, as usual you are the GENERAL! Sadly we have all learned those lessons! Like you said hopefully we will learn from those lessons and become better because of them!

Braves good post as well!

 

Braves

Excellent points, communication must be a two way street and do not assume the other party knows what U are thinking or has all the answers. Communicate, ask questions, do research, things are not always as they seem.
U are also correct on TBR, it has helped me work out issues and hopefully become better at my role. "Sometimes U have to lose to gain!"

 

As a former coach and a present PARENT i want an honest assessment of my childs abilities. Whatever my opinion is, is just that, my opinion. I will, as a parent be either too easy on mine or way too critical. We as parents should WANT honesty about our children if for no other reason than to give them something to work on. There are enough people out there who have "perfect" kids, we don't need mine too. And if you get that honest assessment don't turn around and bad mouth the person who gave it to you. My granny always said "Don't ask if you don't want to know". Now i'm not saying that all coaches are going to be completely right but it's kind of like having a doctor. If you don't like the prognosis, get a second opinion. But if you are on your 5,6,7,100th opinion maybe it's time to open YOUR eyes.