question from a member on overly aggressive coaches

Catch 22

Cheeze the problem you face with dealing with aggressive coaching is how successful has the coach been through the years. Nobody would dare tell a coach to calm down or backoff if he or she has won multi championships,and has made a name for him or herself in the local area. As you already know there are a few coaches even in our state that fit this discription,and their tactics are basically out of line,and overly aggressive. I will not get caught getting into a legal problem naming names I will leave this to your own discretion. I as a player would much rather give my best and respect a coach not for fearing to lose my position as a player, but rather respect him or her because of the LOVE he or she shows toward me,and sharing the knowledge and training that the coach can offer to better enlighten my talent. I have seen over the years as long as a coach is successful nobody will stir the pot no matter how aggressive they are towards any athlete. Sad to say, but's its all about the DOLLARS !!!


---------------------- GURU

 

Idea

Documentation is key! Document, document, document, plus you have to have some people willing to come forward and say this happened to me, I am afraid, I was abused, his words were harmful and bias, he got in my face, he was out of line and mentality abusive!
I know this is a big undertaking but without a track record of abusive behavior with several truly documented incidents, it is just hard to solve the problem. Heck as we have seen in some cases as Guru points out, it just doesn't matter.
What I found in one case was 1/2 of team or parents may think the guy or gal is wonderful and the other half thinks he is the devil! Sometimes may depend on the relationship and ability to "SNOW" the majority!
Didn't help at all did I Cheese? GURU has struck again! It is usually a matter of bucks or winning, not ethics or caring! LOL

 

my advice is check the laws of the state where this is allegedly occurring and with technology the way it is recording such outbursts should be a simple matter.. AS LONG AS ITS LEGAL without both parties consent in the applicable jurisdiction. Recall the audio that surfaced many years ago of Bobby Knight in the locker room?

BR has it right though.. nothing happened to Knight as the result of that either... success/winning is the ultimate deoderant as someone once said.

 

AGGRESSIVE COACH

WHAT CAN YOU DO ABOUT A UNDER AGGRESIVE COACH. LOL

 

Valid Point !!

We will have to start another thread on this TOPIC !!!---- LOL

Guru

 

Facts

Agree with you Rodney having had a DD in one of the above situations ,the Administration only deals in FACTS and not hearsay.Once all FACTS were investigated the situation was handled by the AD.She went on and had a very successful college softball experience.This took a lot of guts on the part of many players to stand up and say this was not correct.Having been exposed to this the next DD did a lot of listening and watching coaches in their element ,being at their games listening to how the talk to their players and handle adverse situations much like the reverse recruiting process.Everyone wants a Coach to look after their DD like they were theirs and I feel I have this here at UNCC the coaching staff from the AD down are the best.No player should have to put up with any verbal abuse or be put in harms way.

 

Is this HS? If so contact Board of Ed - it works.

Given the number of years I coached rec ball, "my girls" are scattered over the better part of 2 counties. When my daughter's school was not playing I would go watch "my girls" play at their schools and several times a month would go watch them at their practices. In '06 and '07 a couple of "my girls'" mothers called me to discuss their concerns regarding a specific coach and how he would talk to the girls, what he would do TO them during practices etc. I had a hard time phathoming that a coach could tell girls they were too fat to play, stop eating (normal, healthy young ladies that were simply not biological sticks); when a player would complain of pain after twisting an ankle of being made to run poles because she was a "baby"; turning teammates against each other through ridiculing some and drooling over others; and, most of all, that any coach would intentionally hit (on too many occasions to count) players with a line drive for missing a ball. Families had complained to the principal, to be informed this coach was an "outstanding teacher, retired military" yada yada and no one believed this could be happening.

When I witnessed just a spoonful of this behavior first hand in a game and over several practices, I took matters into my own hands and contacted the Board of Ed. The gentleman, whom I will not name here, went and observed a couple of practices. Within a week the coach was removed as coach. Now girls that had dreamed of playing in school but wouldn't because of this coach are preparing for tryouts in a couple of weeks. Sometimes you simply have to go way over the heads of the direct line of supervision to get accomplished.

My daughter responds best to the hard nosed, helmet grabbing, screaming coach (I had to ask our tb coach several times last year to stop asking and start demanding) - but not all girls do. In fact, most don't. But there is a fine line between demanding and abusive and if the coach you are speaking of has breached it - go directly to the top.

 

There is never a place for this type of behavior from any coach. My initial question is if this is a HS or college coach? The reply and course of action would be different between the two.

There is a fine line between being a 'Helicopter parent" or being a concerned parent. Given this scenario, I would have no problem scheduling a meeting with the coach and discussing my concerns. You must remain calm during these discussions and be determined to insist on immediate changes.

But if we are discussing a college coach....shame on the parents for not doing your homework and talking to previous and current players on the team about their relationship with the coach. You had a choice.

Again, I am assuming we are not talking about the "holler" coach. That's their style...you may not like it, but get over it. If you can't deal with that kind of coach, I wish you luck (and rose colored glasses) in your future. I know of some college coaches that take that approach to weed out the weak minded.