Daddy Ball

I would like all thoughts on this one and not over my circumstance.
I am an 08 Senior, finishing up a great season with a HS team that didnt finish to their potential. I played all 9 positions this year, hit well over .400 and have entertained several college options to play (One Div I, two Div II, but still just out of financial need I may just play community college ball.) Without revealing who I am, I have been victim of daddy ball since AAU at 10 years old. This is why I learned to play all 9 positions. Every AAU coach that I played for had a kid on the team, so I figured I would learn to play where they didnt. 2 years ago, I was asked to play varsity during my sophomore year but I didnt and had a banner year on JV team. The Varsity coach's son sat on JV behind me when I didnt move up. My junior year I was cut and this Varsity coach moved his son up and he started in my primary position. Not to take away from his abilities, but he had never started in middle school, JV, or Jr Legion. I never sat during those seasons. Yes, I took it hard, but I hit the gym and played with a hard core group out of California. It took me time, but I wrote it off as a learning experience. Now after playing 3 Years of jr/sr legion in which I hit well over .400 each season, I am being blackballed my final year. Yes, this coach's son played for him too. Any thoughts how to get the Daddy out of baseball and let me hear your stories. I am thinking about writing a book....

 

Congratulations! If you are truly an 08 graduate, you are one of the most literate young posters I've seen. Job well done in the classroom.

Move on.

 

You will never get Daddy out of the rec leagues. Too bad for you you ran into it at the HS level. Big reason the TOP travel teams are getting the cream of the crop, no daddy's coaching. The only thing you can take from the experience is that it didn't break your spirit and the HS coach didn't do his son any favors in the game of life.

 

Unless you are coach, prolly many dads & kids have a story like yours. it sucks. you have learned a good life lesson that life is not fair. Daddy ball and favorites at all levels of all sports. it happens in the work place as well. That is life. You have the right attitude about working harder. Hold your head high and try not to let it get you down and destroy you. You keep putting up numbers like that and you will get noticed and rewarded.
It sounds like you will have an opportunity to play somewhere at the next level so focus on that and let go of the past. Also, focus on getting a college degree or learn a trade because when your playing days are over, you are gonna be out in the real world and it will be tough.

 

No kidding, Daddy Ball sucks. IMHO, in school ball, parents shouldn't be allowed to coach their own. Causes too many problems. In fact, I suggest that at no time should parents coach their own regardless of the league.

 

I've also seen kids who were victims to this and then their Daddys would start coaching and turn right around and do it to other kids just to make sure their son got to play where they wanted and bat lead-off or clean-up whichever the kid wanted to do.

I know from experience that it hurts to watch your kid go through this. I know you want to make it all better for your kid but remember what your son went through and don't go out there and do the same to someone else's kid. My son also just kept sticking it out and worked hard. He has not always been the best player on the team and is not a superstar now but he has learned alot about life and will be stronger for going through this and not quitting. He has learned how to be a great teammate.

If you love the game just stay with it. Junior college might be the perfect place for you. Even when the coach does not have a son on the team some will still play favorites and this will happen in the work place as well. Just do the best you can, lift others up, don't try to tear down others or the team and you will be rewarded in life.

 

I’m sorry to see that you ran into this but am glad to see you have options for the future. Hopefully you won’t run into this again and you’ll be a better player and person for having gone through it. Keep working.

Speaking of Daddy Ball, in my observations over the years I have seen a very high percentage of these players wash out of the game at an early stage. I personally believe there are several main causes for this high rate of failure among the recipients of Daddy Ball:

A) It can hide deficiencies in skill sets because these players often play because of who the coach is, not because of their abilities. As you progress through the game of baseball, each new level magnifies any deficiencies in your game. Failure at the game and peer pressure is hard to take, even if your daddy is the coach.

B) They fail to develop the work ethic necessary to continue to improve and compete with their peers. Same reason as above. Remember, someone is always working to get better and if YOU don’t have that internal drive, not your daddy, and if you stop working - you fall behind.

C) They have never learned how to compete for a position and develop the mental toughness that comes with this competition. When they finally run into this, and they will, they won’t know how to handle it. Developing this mental toughness is also important as baseball is a tough game to play and you have to mentally tough to handle the failure that is part of this great sport.

In the end, I feel these Daddy Ballers are the real losers, as a hundred innings as a starter in LL or AAU and all the group trophies will never quite equal the feeling of pride you and your parents will get when you run out on a college field for the first time.

 

The other side

Sounds like you made the best of a very difficult situation - that speaks well of your character and you express yourself extremely well. You will be a success.

The other side: I've known coach's kids who personally carry the burden for the success and failure of their dad's career. They are acutely aware of their mistakes, errors, strike outs, pop ups, ground outs, etc and the whispering of the parents - it's a lot for a kid to shoulder. They really want to please the dad who missed the majority of their younger playing days because he was too busy with his season to make it to his own son's games. It's a difficult dynamic, but in all areas of parenting, we are never doing our kids any favor by not making them earn their way.

 

Wiser than thou

I prefer GRANDPA BALL better. They enjoy watching the games and don't over stress the kids.

 

grandpa ball

So, that is why whenever I played against you guys I had to go to Rocky Mount and you wouldnt never travel to play us.....Grandpa Ball.....hahaha