Do nothing??

Here's the issue - my DD has been the starting pitcher at her HS since she was a freshman, she's a junior now. Yesterday, at the first day of tryouts, the coach tells her she will not be pitching this year because he's going with a freshman. This freshman happens to be his niece who does not even pitch on her travel team. My DD is naturally very upset. He has moved her to 1st base and she is concerned about losing that starting spot if she questions him about the pitching change. Though I very much want to approach him about this, I really think as a parent I should stay out of it. Is there any way to approach this without her ending up on the bench?

 

Word Of Advice !!

I will PM you.... You will like this, I promise !!!

 

Im a big believer that parents should stay out of this kind of stuff. Tell your daughter that sometimes like this happen. Dont get me wrong I dont agree with favoring one kid over another but it happens. So tell her to work harder and prove the coach wrong. My parents would never question a coach but I spend years watching some of my teammates parents pester my coaches to get their kids a starting position. They werent at practice, they didnt know exactly what was going on and who really was the best player. As sad as it is I remember starting a season liking one of these teammates and by the end of the year hating them cause they didnt deserve to be in the starting line up with me. The resentment between us and them tore our team apart.

Maybe the freshman is a better pitcher, maybe she isnt only time will tell. But it sounds like that coach is lucky that if she isnt what he thinks she is then he has a veteran pitcher playing first to come in and clean up the mess.

 

Excellent question - not sure there is a good answer

This type of issue is far too common in HS sports. Unfortunately, it always seems like a no win situation. I'm not sure what parents should do in these situations. Generally speaking the school administration is going to support the coach and dismiss the parental complaint.

To me the sad part is that it seems that some coaches fail to keep the kids in mind. HS should be an enjoyable experience for the kids. It seems that some folks fail to keep in mind how their decisions impact the lives of these youngsters.

It isn't just relatives that benefit from favortism. It can be the softball coach favoring the football coach's daughter or the baseball coach's daughter. In turn, the baseball and football guys are expected to favor the softball coach's son. The players know who deserves to play. It becomes a joke to them. Unfortunately, to the kids that are short changed it isn't a laughing matter. I know a few girls that are getting some college looks based on their summer ball performances. Yet, they can't get a starting position on their HS squads due to favortism of one sort or another. It is a shame.

 

VAsoftball, I don't want to come off as sounding mean, but I have an example to give you. I will not refer to names so that there will not be any lashback to me naming names. At Alexander Central this past year, a girl that had been a pitcher and a darn good one at that, was asked to switch positions and give the pitching responsibility to a freshman. She did this and Alexander Central went all the way and won the state title. Weigh the situation out. I would really give the girl a chance to start off with. If things start going south, I would then ask the coach if you could speak with him. Tell your daughter also that she can be all conference and be just as awesome of a player at 1st base as well. Like I said, I don't want this to sound mean, but I just had an example that I wanted to share. Your daughter may be the best pitcher, but I don't know that. I was just giving an example of a similar action that took place and the coach knew what he was doing. Course everyone that knows Alexander Central softball knows that our coach knows what he's doing most of the time anyways lol.

 

this is a good example of why I have always been an advocate of kids being able to play at another school should they so wish

 

Thanks to all of you for the great advice. My husband and I decided to stay out of the situation and let my DD work through it. She appreciated the advice of 'hittingcoach' especially and decided to follow that course of action. She has a lot of support on the team and is working hard at 1st base. Once the season starts, we will see how it all shakes out.

 

Excellent decision! The advice I give to kids and parents who tell me their coach isn't giving them as much playing time as they want is to "work harder" unless you are already as good as you'll ever be.

 

OMG, reference to a lawyer? About not getting to play where a girl "deserves to play"?

THIS is why I am an advocate of letting the kid take care of herself in HS sports, unless a law is being broken or someone is being hurt.

JEEZ!