Is high school ball benefical

Wow.

My dd has been on both sides of the school ball debate: the team that others considered a "guaranteed slaughter" and the team that played deep, deep into state playoffs.

Indeed it can be frustrating playing for a team which struggles, where coaching may not be at the level a player would like. But this is another area in which school ball can add to a player's maturity and overall character.

By stepping up her game, playing at her level, no matter the level of skill around her, and by "picking up" the teammates that may not have her ability or the benefit of her training; by exemplifying the winning spirit by doing her utmost, on the field, on the bases and in the batter's box; by focusing on what was done "right" this game, instead of dwelling on the score or all that went wrong; and by holding her head high even when that scoreboard reads 22-0, and that 0 is her team.

No matter how bad a team in our conference is, or for that matter, how bad our team once was, did we ever think of ourselves or another team as "the laughing stock of our school and conference." This comment holds not only a great deal of negativity and animosity, but way too much self-importance. Trust and believe that while you may be a check on someone's win list, no one is imbuing a single player or team with so much importance that they spend enough time thinking about them to declare them a 'laughing stock'. This is not 5A High School football in Texas, where entire towns live and breathe for the game. It is North Carolina high school fastpitch softball, whose losses are remembered about a nano second less than their wins by EVERYONE except for the kid who played the game.

But, as I would tell my dd, and sometimes would have to remind myself, when we were that "sure win", and even now that we are not: It is not the score at the end of the game but what you put into it and got out of it that counts. If you played your best game and did your very best to lift up your team, then in the end, you have won. If, on the other hand, you are so focused upon the loss that you cannot applaud for and remember MOST the player that got her first hit of her high school career, then you have walked away a loser.

Losing only holds as much importance as you allow it to have. And if being the "losing team" becomes so distasteful to someone that they walk away from something the claim to love, they not only never loved it that much in the first place, but they have missed two valuable lessons in life: Grace and humility.

 

It all matters on what you want. Realistically playing at AC or ND may have more prestige than playoing some college programs. Thier facilites are better and more people come to watch than some college games.
Some kids playing high school is all they want. Then they can go do somethingelse. It depends are the highs school program and what the kid wants out of it. Just understand in travel ball you have abilty and desire you can step up the program. In high school you are often stuck.

 

I do have a pretty good job. If I did have a job that I was miserable in I would find another job rather than "make the best of it". I also teach my daughter if she is in a bad situation that is making her unhappy, she should change it. I would definitely teach her to avoid a potentially unpleasant situation if at all possible. I certainly wouldn't knowingly encourage her to get herself into an unpleasant situation. If we want to compare this to life lessons what would you say if your daughter came to you and said that her husband was beating her and she was in an unhappy marriage? Would you tell her it was great opportunity to learn a life lesson about getting along with unreasonable people and she should make the best of it? I know that example is a little extreme but if we are going to talk about lessons they will use in life that is not the lesson I want to teach my daughter, but that is just me. On a positive note if she ever gets a job where she has to line up pretty for the National Anthem she'll be in good shape and her senior year of high school softball will not be wasted. Like Kanwj said it all matters on what you want out of it and it is not for every girl. I can't stress enough to look at your program and ask your daughter what she wants out of it and you will get your answer. Every situation is different.

 

nm

 

....with all respect to the previous posts and those of us who have posted, Justsoftballpal has just hit the grandslam on this subject. Game over!


Fishman

 

It is North Carolina high school fastpitch softball, whose losses are remembered about a nano second less than their wins by EVERYONE except for the kid who played the game.

And that is exactly who we are talking about...bad experiences for the kid who played the game. The kid who played the game is the important one here and the kid who played the games remembers forever. If you think the other kids don't make fun of teams that suck, you are sadly mistaken.

Losing only holds as much importance as you allow it to have. And if being the "losing team" becomes so distasteful to someone that they walk away from something the claim to love, they not only never loved it that much in the first place, but they have missed two valuable lessons in life: Grace and humility.

That is your opinion and I couldn't disagree more. No player that truly loves the game likes to lose. If losing is not "distasteful" to someone I wouldn't want them as a teammate. Try telling a kid that loses every game but one that they have received a valuable lesson in life. Good luck with that. Losing is a part of life but losing every game is not fun and anyone that thinks it is, is a very good candidate for High School ball.

 

......Bill Gates is a nerd. I'm sure he had sand kicked on him at the beach growing up. Did he let losing stop him?
Theres a message in this thread for all of us if we'll take the time to see it!

Merry Christmas to all!
Fishpappy

 

Here is a link to a very good book that addresses playing sports with some very good advice:
http://www.allbookstores.com/Wooden-Leadership-John-Wooden-Steve/9780071453394

justsoftball sounds as much like John Wooden as anyone I've read. Like marlin said "he hit a grandslam on the subject."

I hate it that your DD isn't having the kind of experience she wants but there is much to be learned from her experience. I hope she will get something positive from her experience.

One of Wooden's quotes from the book: "The people who turn out best are those people who make the best out of the way things turn out."

 

A quick check of the facts from the NCHSAA website:

In the last five years (2005-2010) the number of high school softball programs in North Carolina increased by 14%. At the same time the total number of high school softball players increased by 30%. Not only are there more programs, but there are a lot more participants in each program. That is proof positive that the popularity of high school softball continues to increase. The total number of participants is now pushing 10,000 statewide. There cannot be many kids having bad experiences or these numbers would not be growing like they are.

There is no doubt that there are a few poor programs out there. They exist on both sides of the fence. Its good that those unlucky enough to be in those programs are being vocal. That is the first step in creating change. The best HS and TB programs in the state are the ones that find ways to work WITH one another.

It would be interesting to see how the travel ball numbers compare.

 

No the reality in life is that too many parents run around behind their kids trying to make life perfect leaving them with few skills except for how to speed dial dad when they cant figure out what to do.

I never said the girl should pitch five days in a row. I never said that any girl should do something that she feels isnt right or healthy. Learning life skills whether it is dealing with a bad coach or bad boss... that is what I was talking about. Learning how to negotiate, explain, use logic to make your point and do it all with a smile of cooperation. Learning how to deal with people instead of running from them.

My DD has had bad coaches and good ones. You learn something about life and softball from every single one of them.