Throwing at PARENTS

I saw the thread throwing at hitters and realized I'd like to throw at a parent, so I named this thread based on my feelings right now.

Have a parent that I am really getting tired of. He thinks his kid should be a two way player and we only see him as a pitcher this season. He's a jr starting pitcher and next season I plan to get him more time defensively.

Today I left practice early and he approached my assistant coach, that is only a 2nd year coach, and basically tried to get him to throw me under the bus with my decisions.

As a team we've struggled a little this year but have won a couple of games in a row and are now jelling as a team. The kid doesnt seem unhappy, just the dad. Dad told assistant that he was thinking of transferring kid to a different school so that he "could be seen". We are a 4A HS and the school he is referring to is a 1A school.

He is the type that likes to blow smoke. Says he can't pay the money for his kid to play with us during the summer but has talked to a showcase coach and plans to take him there this summer.

How do you handle these situations?

 

Simple

LOVE THE THREAD! I didn't know where it was going, but it surely got my attention!

Simple answer: Rule #1 - No Parent Is Allowed to Talk to Any Assistant Coach. Rule #2 - No Parent Is Allowed to Talk to the Head Coach about Playing Time.

Violate either rule and what was a "Pitcher Only" is now a "Indefinite Sub"

As for the threat to move, I'd say it is more of an offer. Take him up on it! It's a free country - TYA Pops.

The only downside here, as it always is, is that the kid suffers for the actions of a Helicopter Dad. Darned shame. Where's my BB gun!

 

Do you really want to put up with this for another year?

 

If you really like the kid and want him around, arrange a player/coach meeting. Tell him your plans for him and assure him you are trying to what is best for him and the team, If the player seems to agree with you arrange a meeting with coach/player/dad. At that point you have done all you can. If daddy and son make the wrong choice you have a clean conscience(you should have one now anyway) but know that you did above and beyond to help this boy.

 

Interesting - I spent 20 years as a college basketball coach, both head and assistant, and one year as a high school basketball coach. As a high school head coach, and college head coach, I had one rule that I made clear to players and parents at the beginning of the year. I would never have a conversation with a parent about their son's playing time - never. I would always meet with them (parents), for as long as they wanted to meet, and discuss their son's academic situation and/or their social issues/situations/problems. I also told both groups I would meet as often as the player liked and discuss playing time with the player, but not at practice, games, etc. It was always in a meeting at a scheduled time, not a quick or emotional type meeting. What I found was that most of my meetings were with my players, and we usually left meetings both on the same page on why playing time was what it was, and how they could improve and gain more playing time. I also used it as a teaching situation of what we/team means, and how we had to have that to win. Worked well for alot of years (not in coaching anymore) and helped with team relationships. Not sure if this helps but thought I would pass it along.

 

I agree... If a parent must discuss child, then come straight to the horses mouth.... If he thinks his son can do better elsewhere, then go there and prove me wrong and I will congratulate him on it, but not you the parent....

The end result, I agree also, the kid is ruined by the parent!

 

who has the best coaching job in the world?

ready........?


The coach at the orphanage!!

NO PARENTS!!

 

My rule is I will not talk with a parent about playing time until the kid has requested a conference and we have discussed it. This kid has not.

From my observation the dad always finds someone to blame for his sons failures. He always talks about the son wanting to play in college but funny thing is, the kid has never expressed his interest to me that he wants to play beyond HS. I think that all players that play HS ball would have some desire to play at the next level but think they realize the amount of work that is necessary to keep playing and that helps them decide HS is where they want it to end.

I guess my question in the end is, should I call for a conference with the parent before his smoldering about his sons playing time causes an inferno among all the parents or would you just not address the situation at all until he ask for a conference?

 

Looks to me like the parent just don't like the coach for whatever reason. I really don't see the problem with talking to parents.. I've coached many years with the younger kids, and always had to deal with parents feedback.. In these situations we normally are in dissagreement, but we deal with it.. Heck, its there kid. Parents should have concern for there kid. I just take it for what it is.Just part of the deal....

 

No words needed.....

Invite the dad to take batting practice, so he can show you where his son got his talent, and then hit him with a few fastballs and I bet he gets the message!!