ETHICS AND MORALS IN TODAYS GAME

OK here's a question for some of you "old timers" out there. What has caused the seemingly changes in the ethical and/or moral codes that has prevailed in fast pitch in previous years. Have heard of at least half a dozen different occasions of parents attacking umps, coaches going after tourney directors, coaches and parents fighting at tourneys, and now even girls fighting with each other. I'm not talking just arguements, but actual fighting. Also, have seen or heard of pitchers throwing at batters on purpose whether for retaliation or for intimidation. Seems to me that we are seeing a slow progression towards a "baseball" type mentality with the fast pitch game. (although i don't think i've ever heard one baseball player talk about another's hair or a teams uniforms lol). Are these things going to continue to escalate to the point where we have bench clearing brawls or is this just a passing fad? Who ultimately is responsible for these problems? The organization and its umpires for letting it go on, the coaches for what they are teaching these young ladies, or the parents and kids, for the amount of pressure we put on these young ladies to play at higher and higher levels or possibly playing way above the level that their genetics or situations will allow. We all have had the discussion about the dilution of the talent pool due to girls not getting "what they deserve" and this probably has an impact at the younger ages but why problems with the older ages where the player pool is depleted due to "other interests". Is this just a social progression where the "ME" generation has now developed into the "ME and MY KID" generation.
Please try to keep this as civilized as possible, I am not trying nor want to single any organization, player, parent, or team out. Just a general question from sights and reports over the beginning of this season and a concern for this great game that we all have a love/ love/hate relationship with. IMO fastpitch softball takes this game(after all it is an offshoot of baseball) back to the basic ideals that the game started out with in the sandlots of every town in America and puts it in an organized format. And always remember "We're all just a bunch of kids playing a game".

 

Morals and ethics are taught by parents, I teach my children to respect their teachers, coaches and adults. It is also the coaches responsibility to enforce ethics....seen alot of girls lately throwing bats & helmets....coach stands by and says nothing. This past weekend a helmet came out flying out of the dugout-thrown by a player just put out at 3rd base. When I ask the coach why he was tolerating that behavior. He replied...we've talked and talked...they just won't listen. Ultimately, how the girls act at tournaments, reflects what the coach is tolerating or teaching.

 

as a coach let me say that respect is earned and not given. these are adolescents so they are beginning to understand life.. they know when they are being sold a bill of goods. they know when they are being outright lied to. I wouldn't expect respect to be given any respect as a coach if I don't treat my players with decency and honesty and maintain open lines of communication at all times.

 

I heard recently that an asst. coach was asked to leave his team,because he didn't approve of the head coach using 4 letter words around young girls..Fancy That ??? I agree if the leaders aren't doing right why should the kids............:FightenSm

Softball Guru

 

Once saw a coach throw his glove at his daughter hitting her off guard in the stomach after a game in front of the whole team who had assembled for the team talk, poor kid it brought tears to her eyes. Then he stormed off and drove like a mad man out of the parking lot. What's this teaching our young???
I agree with you Softball Guru......

 

Morals

All really good points, but let's put the responsibility where it belongs, in the order in which it belongs. First and foremost, the teaching begins at home, 2nd in the classrooms and third on the teams they play on and the coaches they have. But out of the three, if it is done correctly, the coach will have the most influence on how our young people act, not only on the field, but off the field in every day life. This can be a powerful position if it is backed by everyone involved in the players life. The coach has something the player really wants and has the power to take it away, but if the parent undermines what the coach says or the rules he sets forth, then the player is in charge on all levels, home, classroom and on the field. This however has to start VERY early in the childs life, not just when they are playing organized sports. Learning to deal with others starts when the child is able to undersatnd responsibilty, this can be as early as 9 months old. But the teaching has to be consistent and not just when the parties involved have reached a breaking point. If it is dealt with every time it occurrs, then the child will respect the boundaries and the people that set them. Let's all work as hard as we can "together", to help ALL of our young people.

 

I am a coach and a parent. Both are very important positions. I am a firm believer that these type of things start with the parents. If children see their parents disrespecting umps or whoever, then they do the same. From the coaches' aspect, you have to give respect before you earn respect. Just like being a teacher. Depending on what age group of girls your working with depends on how you treat certain situations. The first time any one of my girls threw a helmet, she would be on the bench beside me. Bottom line is it starts at HOME. Too many coaches forget its suppose to be fun. We as parents today also have forgotten that. Sometimes we are the ones that ruin it for our kids. Let the kids have fun. Not like they're going to go pro. Let them enjoy the game while their young. Then if they are good enough to play in college, then it becomes competitive and worth something. When those four years are up, then what?

 

AMEN!! I agree 100%. My parents from 5 years ago still call me to talk to their daughter. Many of my parents have me talk to their daughters before they do. They respect me, so therefore they take in what I have to say. For some kids they might not have the home life, that athlete is my goal for the rest of the year. I hope to think I've changed a lot of lives in my years.

 

Reflection of society as a whole

Kids actions today mimick society as a whole....you have 80-90% really trying, may not always get it right, and 10-20% who have parents that are irresponsible and knuckleheads and they act the same way. These are the kids with orange hair, every hole in their body is tatooed and filled with metal, and they want attention.

I coach and parent, and let me be the first to say mine don't always get it right but it is always an opportunity to "teach" and if they refuse to be taught, they don't continue to play with me.

 

I agree

My team was in Concord this past weekend playing AAU. We are not a competitive team yet, just learning and trying to do better. We played a team that beat us in a pool game in extra innings and the next day in bracket play, we actually started hitting the ball and was beating them. Their parents were shouting at my batters and had a few of the younger ones crying by the horrible things they were saying. It got so bad, the umpire stopped the game and threatened to kick them out. When they ran the bases, they tried to forearm our girls and knock them down instead of run like your supposed to. On a side note, one of their girls was hit with a pitch(by mistake, you all have seen my pitching staff), after the inning I went over and offered her some ice and asked if she was OK. I was cussed at by parents who said they could take care of their players themselves. I am not a win at all costs coach and care about the girls. Just my two cents!