How do you handle this situation?

A few thoughts on this one...IMHO

I have been reading this post for a few days and have put alot of thought into what you are about to read. Please take this a positive way to possibly deal; with a tough situation. As a coach and father, I see both sides of the issue. Nobody loves my daughter more than her mom and I. It is the same with your child.

I had a player a few years ago that was one of the best defensive catchers I have ever seen. My pitchers could throw anything to him and it never reached the backstop. He had the potential to be a good hitter, but his dad would rehash every at-bat, and ruined his mindset because he would literally tell him how bad he was as a hitter. It was "get a hit or you aint nothing" my players told me that. We played Lee County in the 2004 State playoffs and the night before he was made to hit in the cage untill after 11:00., after we had had a good practice. He came to the game with blisters on his hands and no confidence at the plate. He got an offer from Pitt CC, went there and when his father found out he was not the starter after the first week, he refused to pay any more expenses and forced him to come home. The kid came to me and asked if I could help him out with another school. I convinced Coach Baldwin at Southeastern CC to give him a shot, helped him find a place to stay, and the same thing happened. This young man literally has a genuine dislike for his dad, but he had to quit at Southeastern also, he just could not afford to school without $.

Dads & Moms, please do your son/daughter a big favor, buy them a burger and tell them how proud you are, whether they hit the game winning home run or they go 0-3 with 3 K's. They will remember that for many years when their playing days are over, not some obscure day in high school when they were not at their best. Praise them and push them to do their best, whether they are the star of the team or the biggest role player in the dugout. Encourage them to help their team whether on or off the field and use every moment as a learning experience about life. If you have a question for a coach, ask the coach in private, don't mention it in front of your child, and dont let every other parent in the world know you disagree with a coach, they will get tired of hearing it and evenyually you will be sitting all alone in the stands. I don't know of any coach that will not speak to you if you make the best approach. If you disagree, contact the coach the next day, let him enjoy the win or get over the tough loss so he can answer thoughtfully and not emotionally. What good does it do anyway to stir the pot at home? When that happens, your son will not be at his best, and may miss a golden opportunity to earn a spot. Instead of asking, "Why ain't my son playing?", have your son talk to the coach and get a list of strengths and weaknesses and a list of things to do make him a better player. Encourage your son to do all the little things right, and work on improving the weaknesses and strengtheningh the strengths. If gone about in a positive way, the impact on the development will be greater and it will foster a better experience for everybody.

 

The advice on this thread is absolutely PRICELESS.

Reading it prompts me to tack on what I believe is a corollary: Do your best to be there when your child plays. Even in the midst of those late, teenage years...when it seems we parents are at our "stupidest" and most irrelevant worst...be there.

I'm often reminded of a lunchtime conversation I once had with a couple of business colleagues. One of them I knew to be an outstanding athlete and person; a former member of an SEC university's golf team.

Knowing that I had a son who played baseball he said, "Want to know when I lost interest in baseball and started focusing my interest on golf?" "No, when," I asked? "The day my father stopped coming to my baseball games. He thought I didn't care, he was busy with his business, and I was too proud to tell him it mattered."

I know that I am "preaching to the choir" as I write this; as I would guess that most parents who read this board attend their son's baseball games as regularly as possible. However, sometimes it's not bad to be reminded.

P.S. Of course, the same goes for the entire range of our children's endeavors; whether on a diamond or not.

 

These are great threads. As parents and coaches, we all (most of us anyway, I'm quilty at times) expect more out of our own kids that we should. I think the reason for that is quite simple, we know what there potential is and we want them to succeed. Thinking all along that we know what's best for the child. WRONG !!! Just be there for them and support them whether they succeed or fail.

If we're not careful, problems will surface later on down the road that we (parents & coaches) were not aware off. Just like the threads before. Just try and remember, this is all about the kids, not us frustrated jocks. :xyzthumbs