Yelling

I have used this approach as well to some decent success. I mostly use the sandwich approach on all fielding situations, and similar to JC on the batting issues.

Oddly enough, yesterday, one day after a tourney we won, which we played 4 games in row. one being 9innings, and two that went one extra inning, the coach did some "directional confrontation" while they were on the field during this very hectic and energetic sweep. so we're driving this following day talking about the tourney and things that happened, and my daughter, bless her soul, turns to me and says, "thats what I liked about you being coach. you would say something positive, tell us what we did wrong and then some ways to improve, than tell us, well get it next time, I miss that". I havent coached her in two years, so in my eyes there is a lot to be said for that style.

I also agree with the comments that once you start talking about showcases, it is no longer for entertainment. Maybe for some, but that is not the general idea. but I would think (not yet got there), that yelling at that point isn't really going to accomplish much. If they are going where they want to, they have the ability to listen and take what is needed. I would think if you kept yelling at the older ages, they are just going to give you the "do I look like I give a crap" glare, lol. *not that I have ever seen it*

 

Lets change this around........

....folks. Now its you the parent being yelled at, by whoever, ......how does that make you feel? Does it make you want to do better or kick the heck out the yeller? Yep ,...YELLER! Kids aren't stupid, they feel the same way, including our own children when we yell at them. Yelling for a purpose, i.e, hey kid, what are you gonna do with the ball if it comes to you?...or hey kid, great play is what raising your voice is for. .....and I'll never forget this......my buddys dad once told me that if he asked someone something or tried to communicate in a proper tone of voice and then tried say a second time, still with no response from whom he was attempting to speak, THE HELL WITH IT, his loss....he added that if raising his voice to get his point acrosswas the only manner in which he could communicate to someone, then the value of what he was trying to get across would be worthless. Smart man!

 

Completely agree fish! Yelling at someone immediately makes them go on the defense and feel the need to make excuses for everything under the sun.

Like several other folks on many threads, the girls know what they have done and most of them feel bad enough about it. Instead of tearing them down and making them over think every play from then on, get them to raise their head and focus on the next play.

Also as others have said, you have to make sure you let them know when they have done something right. I am not saying blow smoke for every single play but if they do something outstanding, let them know and feel free to yell so everyone can hear it. They LOVE that!

This goes for everything, not just softball. I think all of us can relate to slapmesilly (I meant slapyasilly ) and others, with the glare', rolling their eyes, broke back syndrome (when they go UGH and fall back in the chair), etc. When you start to yell, you might as well be saying BLAH, BLAH, BLAH cause that is all they hear...

 

None !!!

But we all do it, we that are intense !!!

Guru

 

Guru...

This is what I was talking about when I said "listen to what the coach says, not how the coach says it"! Dog may sound scary as you know what, but be cuddly as a kitten! At your older age groups! 8U should not be screamed at! IMO

 

Keep in mind...girl players may be created equally at age 8 (or whatever age you start them) but they don't all end up the same. My daughter is a prime example. Once the yelling started a few years ago (she's 14.5 now)...I told her a good coach that yells only yells at those he/she knows is capable of more than they're giving. If he/she yells at you...their expectations are greater. Now, remember...I said "good coaches" that yell. I've seen some bad coaches yell for the wrong reasons. Yelling is part of the game. Male or female has nothing to do with it. My advice is to help your daughter toughen her own skin. Teach her how to chanel that yelling into motivation. The last thing she needs to do is take it personally and emotionally. Go to any college game. Chances are you'll see a coach yell.

 

When they go to college they are not going to pat them on the head and tell them it's allright when they screw up. They need to learn not to take it personally.

 

Tuffen Up

Hey, Now I got an excuse for YELLING at her at home. CLEAN UP THAT ROOM, GET OFF THAT PHONE, YOU BEEN IN THE SHOWER 4 30 MINUTES GET OUT..... and more, much, much, more.

 

Different strokes

Like others have said, some girls (and boys) can handle it, others can't. For the ones that can't (not saying there is anything wrong with that), it does the opposite of what you are trying to do, motivate them to get to the next level. It makes them resent you. Unfortunately, it is on the coach to figure out which ones can handle it and which ones can't. So add psychologist to the list (teacher, motivator, and occasional shoulder to lean on) of coaching duties.